Telling Your Spouse that You Want a Divorce
Even though this talk about divorce may be awkward, waiting will only make things in your marriage worse.
Telling your spouse that you want a divorce can be avoided for quite some time, but if your marital problems are escalating, it has to be said eventually. In fact, according to about.com, one of the worst ways to go about facing the problems in your marriage is to avoid the divorce conversation altogether.
Notifying your spouse that you want a divorce by serving them papers by mail or email, or by telling them by requesting a divorce online, is not only surprising, but it can also be degrading. However, believe it or not, this method is very common, and used by many people. Of course if the relationship itself is abusive or dangerous in anyway, letting your spouse know about the divorce by mail or through online divorce is a great solution.
However, using this indirect method simply to avoid an inevitable conversation about divorce is just downright rude.
Also, these methods will lead to a confrontation on a later date, and it might even result in an angry spouse showing up at your house. Ultimately, serving divorce papers out of the blue is only going to worsen the situation and cause a lot of anger.
This also goes for those who pack their bags one day and take off. While this may avoid an awkward conversation for a small amount of time, spouses still have each others contact information and are bound to show up one day expecting answers.
Considering the fact that you married this person, you should be able to talk with them, right?
Essentially, the best way to go about it is to simply sit down and let your partner know that you would like to end the relationship. Of course there will be a lot of negative emotions, sadness, tears, etc. but this is really the only respectful way to go about it. Additionally, avoiding the divorce conversation might lead them to think that you still love them (when in fact you don’t), will only hurt them more in the long run and make the conversation all that much harder. Much like quickly ripping a band-aid off and accepting that it is going to sting a little bit, these sit down conversations are extremely beneficial.
Fortunately for some couples, these conversations actually go very well. Though it is uncommon, some couples mutually decide that a split is for the better, therefore, the conversation is fairly simple.
The team at it's over easy online divorce service recommends talking about divorce as soon as possible with your spouse. The ideal outcome for your divorce is to reach mutual agreement on the important issues you will face, such as child custody, division of personal assets and spousal support. Speaking with your spouse in advance of filing for divorce can make it much more likely that they will be open to agreement on these matters. Talking is a huge part of relationships, and if you are unable to sit your spouse down and have this conversation with them, then the relationship wasn’t too great after all.