Back to Blog


Forget the Drama, Avoid The Trauma: A How-to (and How-not-to) Guide to Divorce


Written Exclusively by Robin Descamp

As a visitor to It's Over Easy online divorce, you are likely either in the process of divorce, or about to be. You have probably perused the self-help section of many a bookstore, looking for guidance on how to handle what will likely be one of the most difficult challenges of your life. 

Perhaps you didn’t find what you were looking for, so you found your way to here. Welcome! The fact that you are searching for information beyond yourself, and your lawyer, indicates your understanding that there is more to divorce than meets the eye.

I wrote the book Forget the Drama, Avoid the Trauma to help people just like you.
The objective of my book is to provide readers with three major take-aways:

  • The knowledge of how the Divorce Industrial Complex works, including the financial motivation of far too many divorce lawyers;
  • How to avoid the pitfalls of nasty and contentious litigation by exercising personal accountability, close case-management, and perhaps most importantly, embracing the concept of forgiveness;
  • Identification with my own personal experiences, as well as those of others cited in the book, giving the reader a sense of community, as well as some good laughs. As a twice-divorced divorce lawyer of divorced parents, I consider myself the triple-threat of authority on the subject.

While it is true, I wrote this book for you – I also wrote it for me. There are two voices in this book, both of which can serve you well going forward. There is my professional voice, based upon my work and research experience, and there is my personal voice, based upon my life experience as a woman who has been divorced twice.

Professional Voice:

This book is the result of my years researching and working within the divorce law profession (or what I sometimes refer to as “The Divorce Industrial Complex.” Over and over again, I have seen divorcing spouses making terrible mistakes, often at their lawyer’s direction, that result in long-lasting negative impacts for the litigants, while at the same time enriching the lawyers.

Not only am I a family law attorney, but I’ve also researched and written extensively and critically on the topic of divorce law for years. I am one of the most vocal critics of the problems within the current system, many of which I believe are fueled and exacerbated by both lawyers and clients. My time in the trenches has given me the insight to write not only about the law of “family law,” but also the dirty tricks of what can be a very dirty trade. This book will educate you on very specific actions you can take (and avoid) to preserve you mental health, that of your children, as well as your financial well-being.

While there are plenty of books out there on the subject of divorce, this one digs deep into the particulars of both the legal process and the attorney-driven litigation process, two things that sound very similar, but really are not. This book will teach you what you should expect from the divorce process from beginning to end, how to engage in proactive litigation management with your counsel, and most important: how the “napalm” approach to divorce serves only one master: the divorce lawyer who seeks to get rich off the misery of his or her clients.

Personal Voice:

However, my book is not just a how-to (and how-not-to) guide to your divorce, based upon my experience working within the family law system. It is also a memoir of my personal history with divorce, beginning in my childhood and stretching into my adult life as a woman who went through two divorces - one which was extremely amicable, and the other which was not.

My hope is that as you read this book, you will discover that as much as your divorce path feels terribly lonely and isolating, you are experiencing the same indignities and difficulties many others have. The inclusion of my own personal difficulties, along with those of the many I have met and worked with over the years, provides the reader a critical touch-point, and reassures them that what they are feeling is normal, and that they are going to be ok. My own metamorphosis from a panicked and paralyzed “ex,” to a person who completely reinvented herself within a few short months (proving, more than anything else, that necessity is truly the mother of invention), provides an uplifting and damn funny flip side to a book also packed with critical and specific advice on how to navigate the legal waters of divorce.

About the Author:

Robin DesCamp was born and raised in Portland, Oregon, graduating from the University of Oregon with a BA in Political Science. She earned her law degree from Northwestern School of Law at Lewis and Clark College, graduating and beginning the practice of law in 1997. Her creation of an advice blog ( led her to write this book, as she noted scores of people seeking the same advice on difficult family law issues, often centered around bad behavior by divorce lawyers.

Robin also had a regular advice column on news website, the Portland, Oregon arm of, a multi-media company with several outlets around the United States. Robin’s column was consistently the top-rated item on the website.

Today, Robin enjoys a robust private practice, focusing on both business and family law, in Portland, Oregon. She remains a fierce critic of the Divorce Industrial Complex, and continues to write about the abuses committed by unethical lawyers against their own clients. She shares a home in Portland with her son, Jake, and their drunken Chihuahua, Archie. For more information tap here to visit Robin on her website.

To get your copy of her book, visit her page @Amazon